Time to Reset – Breaking the Stress Pattern
Awake at 3AM.
My mind doesn’t know the difference. It treats the dark like daylight. Planning. Strategizing. Working out logistics for the burning problem of the day.
For me, running a business is stressful. As a healer, I feel more at home inside clinical strategy than marketing strategy. At 3AM, risk feels riskier. My blood is pumping. My mind is racing. Doubting thoughts parade through the night.
This is what sympathetic hyper-arousal feels like.
It’s the same physiology I teach my clients about. And I am not immune.
Between marriage, raising two boys, seeing 25-30 clients a week, and running a growing practice, there is often little time for myself. The self-care I preach inevitably becomes my teacher. When I wake like this, I know something important:
My nervous system is overloaded.
Not broken.
Not failing.
Overloaded.
The Nervous System Behind the Story
When we are overwhelmed, the sympathetic branch of the autonomic nervous system mobilizes us for action. Heart rate increases. Muscles tighten. Cortisol rises. The mind scans for threat and tries to solve it. In modern life, that “threat” is rarely a predator. It’s uncertainty. Growth edges. Financial pressure. Responsibility.
The vagus nerve-our primary parasympathetic pathway-plays a central role here. It runs from the brainstem through the face, throat, heart, lungs, and gut. It helps regulate heart rate, breath, digestion, vocal tone, and our capacity for social connection.
When vagal tone is strong, we can shift states more fluidly. We can mobilize when needed and return to calm when the moment has passed. When it’s strained, we get stuck in loops-wired, bracing, hyper-vigilant. Or collapsed and shut down.
At 3AM, my vagal brake isn’t fully online. The body is mobilized without an exit ramp.
Returning to the Light Switch
Going to the gym helps-but it’s not the answer. I had to step back from regular yoga asana due to chronic back pain. So I return to the meditation cushion, as I’ve done since my early 20s.
I remember my breath.
The inhale says I’m here. Slow, deliberate exhale. Gentle pauses.
Lengthening the out-breath to stimulate the vagus nerve.
Softening the jaw.
Letting the tongue rest.
It is subtle.
Like feeling around in the dark for a long-lost light switch obscured by the busyness of my life. I am a giver. That is my comfort zone. Giving to myself is something I have to practice intentionally. My breath gives me a way back.
I don’t have 90 minutes to practice in the morning like I did before kids. I need efficiency.
Three to seven minutes can be enough to begin shifting the internal state. Enough to remind my body that it is not under attack. Enough to widen the lens.Now I’m finding 20 minutes in the AM can create a stillness that sets the foundation for the day.
This is not about eliminating stress. It’s about increasing flexibility.
Reset is not collapse.
Reset is re-organization.
It’s allowing the nervous system to complete cycles that were interrupted. It’s strengthening vagal tone so that activation doesn’t automatically become suffering. And it’s remembering that we cannot think our way out of a physiological state. We have to work with the body.
A Small Practice You Can Try Tonight
If you wake at 3AM:
Place one hand on your chest, one on your belly.
Inhale gently through your nose for 4.
Exhale slowly for 6-8, as if breathing out through a straw
Repeat for 3-5 minutes.
Let go of solving anything. Your only job is to lengthen the exhale.
You are not trying to force sleep.
You are restoring vagal regulation. Sleep may follow. Clarity often does.
Need more practice?
Breaking the Stress Pattern
Citrine Larkspur, CA
Thu, May 14, 2026 6:30-7:45 PM
https://momence.com/Citrine/Breaking-the-Stress-Pattern/133453944
This workshop offers a practical, somatic approach to working with stress, anxiety, and emotional overwhelm; Body-based tools for anxiety, overwhelm, and emotional regulation. Rather than focusing on “coping” or trying to eliminate stress, we’ll explore how stress actually shows up in your body-and how to respond to it more effectively in real time. You’ll learn simple, accessible tools drawn from somatic psychology, mindfulness, and nervous system science to help you:
– Settle anxiety and overwhelm
– Stay present under pressure
– Work with shutdown, numbness, or over-control
– Build a more flexible and resilient response to stress
This is not a typical yoga or meditation class. It’s an interactive workshop that combines brief teaching with guided, experiential practices you can apply in daily life. No prior experience is needed.